J-Pop Dawg's J-Pop Life

Sunday Night... Got Paiseh, Got Drunk, But Got No Beating...

2006-09-20T12:30:00.000+08:00

Sunday I go to meet this Rizal. I think more and more then I get more and more angrier. I think from after lunch all the way until the sun go down the mountain. I angry until cannot control. Lucky got my good friend Martell ah... so I drink. I drink damn a lot man. Drink until maybe half bottle then go to meet this Rizal. I bring my Martell also, in case must wait.

But then what happen I also dunno. I go to the place (say before cannot tell you all where, actually is behind Junction 8 in Bishan) and wait, and drink some more, and wait some more. I never see any Indian guy like looking for somebody like that. Then I dunno how come suddenly sleep... I never even know I was falling asleep!

Suddenly got somebody shake me. Wah, damn hard to wake up... this guy ask me if I okay a not, need to go hospital a not. Quite nice guy, this Malay guy, then I also quite seh, so I go and tell him all my problem. He sit down with me, and I tell him about my Jenny leave me go with that chao turtle Ah Lian Killer.... then I tell him now my new girl also want to patch back with ex-boyfriend.

Wah. I really si beh suay man... I tell him her name is Coco and now I waiting for her ex to meet me because I want to beat him because he try to patch back with her. His face that time really change man, but I so seh I never see.

Wah piang eh. I actually very shy to say, so take 3 day to post this blog. Turn out this guy is Rizal! He straight away take the Martell out my hands and drink until not much left. This time I still dunno is him. I say wah... you drink Martell si beh power... but next time dun finish mine leh. Then he tell me he is who. I shock until balls drop. NANDAYO!!?!? You mean I sit here like sotong and tell you my problems when really is you the problem next to me, some more try to help me??

But then he tell me he never know Coco got new boyfren. When I tell him and suddenly he know he say he "lagi sad lah" then that's why he drink my Martell until want to finish.

That's mean he never try to break up me and Coco lah! That's mean Coco never tell him she got new boyfren lah! That's mean this guy is really quite steady lah! Then I feel damn bad man... I want to beat him, but he never do anything to me. He never even know me but he damn gao brudder. He say now he know he dun call Coco liao. I tell him you are like the brudder I never got. I tell him finish the Martell. Finish nevermind, he so gao brudder I bring him drink one more bottle. How many bottle he can drink, I chia him drink!

I think I never drink so much before sia. I see him, I think he also never drink so much before! We drink until si beh seh (dunno why he everytime say "lagi jialat"). I think he get lost in the bonsai plants, but I so seh I vomit and then sleep also dunno what happen to him.

Next day I want to chia him go eat, but he say his stomach "tak boleh tahan" and some more he need to by himself awhile. I think I also understand lah. This guy is one kind man... I tell him we be brudder together. He say maybe. I think I must do something for him... like save life kind.

But now I win liao! Coco wun leave me now! But then I also a bit du lan... why she never tell him she got new boyfren? Like not fair to me also not fair him right? Should ask her or not? I slowly go and think first...

Sunday Night Beating!!

2006-09-16T09:45:00.000+08:00

Yesterday I phone the Rizal. He confuse dunno who am I, but then I tell him I am Coco friend, and she is having some problem but cannot say anything to her... I tell him need to talk to him about it can meet me Sunday night? He say okay. So Sunday night I going to settle liao. The idea get him come and meet me quite good right? My fren Cowboy give me idea, he say if I jio him fight he sure dun come, better bluff him first say Coco got some problem then let him come first, then after that beat. Good right? He damn smart, my fren...

This few day, also never talk to Coco much... I call her but she say not feeling well dun want come out meet me. I say I go visit her also she say dun want. Why like that?? Maybe she and the Rizal really got something liao... if got I also dunno what to doing. But then I call her house her mother also say she whole day sleep, think must be really sick. So poor thing right, my Coco??

I think maybe I Sunday after fighting win already then I go and bring her flower and green tea and visit her house. Then can tell her I beat her ex liao and tell him dun come back. Then me and her can happy like bird.

Oh, I also never post here where I meeting this Rizal because, now I become celebrity blogger, wait people read already then come and make trouble, or call police or dunno what also. (quite smart, hor?)

Today I going to train at beat people... watch ninja movie! Gambatei!

I Know You Are Who!

2006-09-13T13:39:00.000+08:00

Today I go for lunch wif Coco at Taka. The food not bad, but then she go toilet that time I check her phone! (thanks you rainie your idea really the best!) I see got a lot of people calling her but how to know who is the ex? Then I go and see her message... tio! Got different different name, got some from me she also save, so kawaii, and then got one name a few message. I whole life also never read so fast before! This name, Rizal (I think maybe Indian), got one message say "Beb, I know last time I wrong, but give chance lah. Patch back to me, okay? - luf, R"

Basket! I find you out liao, you wait! You better stay away from my chiobu, or I consperm beat shit into you!

I faster take down his number, then put the phone back in her handbag. Heng she never come out until after I finish! Now I must jio this ex come and fight... but I also dunno where to fight leh... anybody got idea?

Another Bakayero!

2006-09-10T01:40:00.000+08:00

Today I very du lan. Coco tell me last night her ex got call her, ask her if want to patch back. She say last time he very bad to her, play with other girl when she not there, and then never call her, and then some more when she go with him to meet his fren, always bo hiu her. But she say last night he call he talk very nice, and say sorry for everything and he know he last time very bad but now change already. She say now she very confuse...

Nandayo! Then I become what, giam cai ah? She say she dunno what to do. I tell her dun talk to him anymore, then she quiet quiet never say anything. I think maybe this one must go and beat. I show her my fighting powerful, more power than her ex, maybe she dun think already. But how to find him? How to jio him fight? His name even also I dunno...

Got anybody got idea how to find him? Ask Coco is can, but then I scared she find out already she dun let me beat him. No, this one must myself go and find and fighting, so she cannot stopping me. If anybody know who is Coco ex-bf, or got idea how to find, pls tell me leh

Go Zoo Crub

2006-09-03T22:03:00.000+08:00

Saturday I go to the Zoo Crub. People got tell me the place very haps. So go lor. Maybe they consider a bit lucky because many people always ask me go out but I go with them.

This Zoo Crub place got no animals, but the place very crowded. Got many cha bor but no cha bor can be as chio as my Coco. But nevermind, the bar behind got a lot bottles of Martell so I feel shiok like this.

Look see look see a bit, then I go to walk inside the membels. Inside even more crowded, these people siao ah. I ask my friend how come like this. He say Membels is for the excrusive people. But I say Membels so small then sommore got more people than outside. Like this where got excrusive? He laugh and say "J-Pop Dawg, you just don't understand. " Hmm. Maybe I really no understand. Maybe got people hear I got going to coming here tonight, I don't know. I drink until a bit seh liao.

Inside one big big table, got smell a bit like vomits one. I got see one guy. The guy shake his hand until the waitress come to the table. Then the guy tell the waitress, “Siao Jie, 1 green tea.”

My flavorite readers, you all knows me. I never bluff you. Even in the club he got order the green tea. I think maybe he is a Japanese brother also! I think maybe he can be a fan of my blog. Maybe he can be my number one fan too? (My friend say sure can. He say this kind of bet cannot lose one, he say people got tell him I very famous already.)

Then before i can Nihon-jiang with my brother, I see something really siao! Something consperm cannot believe kind!!

THIS CRAZY GUY TAKE THE GREEN TEA AND MIX WITH MARTELL! SIAO!

He see my face blur blur and then he laugh. “HA HA.”

Then he asks me drink some. Crazy!!! He dare to mix my darling green tea with my flavorite Martell. How can such things!? Lucky I real man. Brave like hero. I is J-POP DAWG. I wun say no one. I cannot say no. If don’t then tomorrow I where got face!

So I drink.

Basket. Actually si beh steam.

I look the siao gao in the face. I thinks, this Martell Green Tea Guy, he is my new hero. I tell him, his name is MGT Guy because he know how to mix my two flavorite drink into one super flavorite drink. Confirm last time he must be bartender one. I ask him is it true. He say I am very smart (of course.) But now he play too much computer game already that kind, got injured and cannot be bartender liao. I ask him how come. He say he play computer games until now his fingers a bit bengkok. I say even his face also a bit beng also. He also say to me that I no understand. I think really I must be already seh.

Nevermind. He teach me a new drink to give my honey Coco to drink. This kind of kay siow drink, not everyday can find one.

Really lor, I love Martell.

My Coco

2006-09-03T12:18:00.000+08:00

Today morning never do anything. Last night lim too much. Drink with Ah Pui until steam. I wake up and Coco was on my side. I feel happy. She always at 4 floors when I drunk. I love. After wake up, she give me rabah and I bring her go walk walk. We likes the outsdoor and the fresh wind.

Coco say I look very hamsome in the morning. I also think so. Tonight I go find her again. I love her deep deep. She love me long time. I miss my martell.

It's a Funny Things

2006-09-03T00:03:00.001+08:00

Wah. Today go eating again with Coco. Everyday always also go eating. My budget kena blow like those tall girls from Changi Village last time man. Really lor, Singapore is expensive until jialat. And not say my Yen investments doing well in the FOREX you know. So I say, we go Kopi Tiam to eating. Spends less there ma. Of course, we get there that time already got see the Ah Pui eating lor. But today he smile me and keep eating his prawns. I think, maybe this ah pui can be quite steady one.

Nevermind. The mai tan come that time, BASKET, the ah pek try to cheating me. Lucky the ah pui see and come to settle the tai ji. In the end, ok, so I say to the ah pui, “Oi, you the steady man. Come, we lim!” So we go to lim. Of course we go to lim Martell (and other things)! We really lim alot.

Actually, drink too much, also not so good. Sometimes, I dunno la. Can see things sia. Funny things. Thing that make you go “hmm” that kind of things. You see. Got the funny light in the sky. I think, wah, the sun come so fast. Usually, I in the bonsai bush liao when the sun chut. This time, I only half whack finish the Martell. Jialat.

Then actually, ah pui and me hear got sound. Then the light brighter until we see something.

My gods. I so scared I nearly hugs the ah pui.

Then we see a things. It looks like a mans. Some more can smile at us and says "HEE HEE HEE!"

Luckily, after 1 second, the things disappear liao. But jialat. The Martell also disappear. I look at the ah pui. The ah pui got look at the table. Then the ah pui look at me look at him. I think, our face, also both the same white white color one.

The Martell Monster go and take my Martell!

Ah Pui say it’s a funny things. But I say I think I better drinks less man.

Hentai man

2006-08-29T12:27:00.000+08:00

Wah....today so tired....even after rest 2 day still not enuff. Too much CoCo...too much larchee. Last nite I very the tired so I oyasumi early than usual. I must tell you all, at Marina got this damn humsup guy that keep on looking at Coco and me larchee in bush. Nah! I show you picture of him (heng I buy the new SE K800i so picture very very the clear).

I say to him...exscu me? Hallo? Shimimaseh! Can you please not kachiao my larchee? But he keep on staring at us....wah piang! I mean Nani?!?! Why you keep on looking at my Coco? He look macham like teng my Coco Sah wit his eyes. That one really dirty dawg leh! Confirm hentai one.

I wan to larchee somemore but Coco say she dun want anymore coz dat hentai keep on staring at us! He still got time to drink my favourite green tea (with sugar) and eat keropok! So now already tu lan I tell Coco we go home lah. Then walking to the bus stop, got someone come and "Chut Chut!" us. I turn around. KNN! hentai man again...

I think he really something wrong one....Coco scared until she hide behind me...I of course not big and moto POWER like ah pui but still must protect my baby mochi rite? Actually I almost want to pah him but LUCKY! Got police on motocycle nearby so he speed off and drift around the Marina corner. NANDAYO?!?! Still must hao lian!?He think he Takumi's Lao-peh meh?..oops I mean O-ya-ji.

Anyway by that time I very the tired so I send Coco back and go home to Oyasumi.

Dunno why but I think hentai man look a bit like the stupid bisexual turtle. Maybe his onisan (for pple dat dunno Japanese, I teach you. Onisan is nao hia and nao hia is onisan.)

Why my Sakuragirl leave me for him?!?! I think she also a bit hentai...can like this kind of pattern.

Maybe because he model for Otaku weekly. But nevermind...I now famous celeb blogger. Okay now I feeling tired must go watch my most favouritest anime Bleach. I think I will change my hair style to Kuchiki Byakuya!

Then Coco will think I even more kahgoyuuuu!!!

Woo! Saturday night

2006-08-27T06:08:00.000+08:00

Today Saturday. I take me and my love butterfly go Marina South. I tell her, now she my girl, must treat her makan. We sit down already, then... wah piang. I see got one ah pui there. He eat like my whole family granmother granfather all together eat. His prawn shell pile until like Mount Biang. Really wah piang eh. His table no space even for a fly to land down. Jialat.

We see him. Then he see us. Then he stop. He grab the tua fish and pull to him, then he stare us. I scared when he no more food sekali he also want to eat us sia. He pull the fish to him. I pull Coco to me. Then I go and ask him, he so fat already, why he still dare eat so much. He say today his family not in town. His family go Genting for holiday. He hungry, then alone eat lor.

I ask him, “Oi, then your dinner at home everyday eat what?”

“Aiyah, normal one” he say. “Sometimes got meat lor. Got chicken, then got beef. Then got vegetables, maybe like sambal kang kong and tofu. Then must have a bit soup, then got fish for healthy. Then after that only noodles and rice lor.”

I say, piang eh, his one family dinner can feed Little Tokyo. Knn

I see Coco like very bored already. I see the ah pui pull the fish closer and eat again. Really really never see before this kind of thing before. Like that I also cannot already so go back to my Coco Pops. Coco say she see him eat until cannot eat already. See already then dowan to eat liao. So we go in the bush and La chee. I how champion lor. Actually, must say thanks you to the pui eh.

Finish already, we go to arcade to pah game… I go to my best game…. DDR – Dance Dance Relavution. Of course I just pak tor, feel damn shiok, so I whack the hard level. This hard level must chut pattern like badminton. Coco see until seh seh. Bo pian, she ask me go back to the bush again. Shiok man. One time dinner, two time le chee. I how King lor.

The End

2006-08-25T23:57:00.001+08:00

It's hard to sleep on my tatami, it's hard to drink my green tea, its hard to eat my ramen. I cannot stop think of that turtle with my girl.

Oh, you all forgot is it? You good! When last time we was younger in Hokkaido, he his own self give himself the name "Bisexual Turtle", cause he say the male turtle can swim fast fast, got the shell strong strong and live very longly. Then the bisexual part because he think because it mean two times the sexualpower! HAHAHA!

Then only later he older then he change to Ah-Lian Killer. Now my friend tell me, heard he scared i angry already. He scared like turtle! HAHAHA!

He is running away to America, he is afraid i will come after him. He damn stupid man. America, the ramen taste like rubber. I tell you it's it's true man. I got read it on Ramen Weekly, the official weekly newspaper of us j-pop guys. All j-pop guys love good ramen. And if you love good ramen, you'll got read Ramen Weekly.

Now i hear the jenny cry because he throw her one side. I don't care. You know why i don't care? Because Coco say to me already, her feelings for me are golden and for lifetime. Golden like the sun of the land of the rising sun. Lifetime like my love for Martell. It's true. I can really feel her loves.

She say together we will have many j-pop kids. So now, i going to be a man. Do the right thing. So now i will marry her. And maybe i will stop this celeb blog. Because now i have her and my Martell.

So thank you. Thank you for being my number 1 fans. Thank you for my famedom. I will always think of you in my j-pop dreams.

Now I know.

2006-08-25T21:38:00.000+08:00

Today someone told me something. Something that make my world change inside out. Something really horrible. Really terrible.

Actually it is not because of my famedom Jenny leave me. It is because of... HIM. THAT BLARDY GUY! My arch enemy. AH-LIAN KILLER. Damn that stupid guy man. Someone show me the photo today of them together. At that moment I knew. Jenny is not really a Sakura Flower. She is not even an origami flower!

It's just too much for a j-pop guy to take. Even a few Martell Green tea not enough to fight the taste of the kikkoman on my tongues. I always knew since I won him in the ramen eating contest he'll want to revenge me. But I never knew thisturtle guy would succeed. Jenny is now... HIS GIRL.

My j-pop heart never know such pains. O Sakura girl!
HOW CAN YOU JUST THROW AWAY MY TENDER HEART FOR YOU!!!!
AHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Tonight I know I will hug my Martell to sleep.

Bye Bye Jenny

2006-08-23T04:31:00.000+08:00

I have no more sakuragirl.... Jenny say she dowan to be my steady anymore. :( Why i also dun know. She say I cheat her feeling... where got, i ask you... I tell her I only meet fren wat! Nothing wrong wat, got wrong meh?? :( Now she say i spend all my time on the blog, got no time for her... but she must understand that this is what i do!!!. I want to become a famous blogger Daphne Teo the chio bu, wah you see her.... sure steam man... I don't bluff.. bluff got money win? Dun have, so no bluff.. chio man her.

Anyway this Jenny, I think she is angry and jealous that I bring other girl go eat sushi.

I think she jealous. This kind of people cannot be together with celeb bloggers lah. I no need her. I got my Martell, got my J-Pop, and got my Coco.

Go Orchard

2006-08-21T02:46:00.000+08:00

Today i go for coffee at Orchard because the green tea in the 7-11 is cold and got sugar.

The coffee quite expensive and they don't take my Yen. Nevermind i change the money at Orchard Towers. Some of the girls in Orchard Towers quite friendly. Very tall. I thought they look a bit foreign. I think today I look quite good since three of them came to talk to me. We have some coffee on the other side of the road. Got some people keep looking at us. Some people jealous of other people got good luck to sitting with three girls maybe. My j-pop feelings told me to heck care them and gambatei!

The girls take some photos of me and send to me. They kiss me good bye and ask me to keep in touch. Even Nakata also don't have this kind of lucky.

Now I got to think how to make Jenny happy. Anybody got idea?

Die.

2006-08-21T02:30:00.000+08:00

Today Coco meet me for dinner at Sushi Tei... I was very happy. I was also a bit paiseh because she said she saw my yesterday blog. Oops! But is okay lah, she thinks I am very funny. So order and eat. She even mix my wasabi in my shoyu for me!

But then got problem. My sakuragirl (her name Jenny) call me! She ask me what I am doing, so I tell her lor. My lau beh always say must be honest, so I tell her I am havnig dinner with Coco. Then she ask me who is Coco, I say I met her from Momo the other night. Then Jenny get damn angry and start scolding me very jialat in hokkien. I also dunno tell Coco what... so I pretend, I say "okay mom, i talk to you later lah" then I put down the phone. So Coco settle already. I turn my phone to silent and then eat my sushi. Guess what? Coco say her favorite food is sushi! After dinner I ask her come my house and listen music, but she say she got things to do, maybe another day go. So I send her to the bus stop and wait for her bus come.

But then now... Jenny never pick up when I call her, and I sms also she never reply. I think I got trouble liao..... but then... I also got Martell. So trouble I later then think lah!

Coco!

2006-08-19T19:59:00.000+08:00

This week I go to Club Momo with my frens. It is quite happening, got a lot of chio bu's and the music is also not bad. So I go and dancing dancing with my frens, and I drink my favorite Martell, quite fun lah. Then ah, got this girl come to talk to me. Wah! I think she is quite cute leh, some more she want to come and talk to me? I think my friends all damn jealous man.

She tell me that her name is Coco, and she saw my blog before. So fast got people know me already! I am how happy lah! She give me her phone number and ask me to call her. I think tomorrow I call her and we can go and eat sushi.

Too Much Martell

2006-08-15T14:03:00.000+08:00

I think I drink too much Martell yesterday already... I woke up and... NANDAYO?!? 3am! 8 hours in the bonsai plants! I even miss my Sushi Tei date with my sakura girl... bakabakabaka....

It is very heart-pain that in Singapore, at night got no Japanese food. I thought got one.. my fren tell me before, at Newton Hawker Center got this place call Takara. Japanese food! Middle of night also can get! So I went to Newton Circus. But they bluff... Takara is not Japanese food! So I must to eat other things... but then Newton got Asahi beer, so I drink Asahi and eat mee goreng and pretend that it is ramen. Not bad lah. I like soup ramen, but dry... can lah can lah. Buggers cannot choose, right? Or something like that lah.

Now I must go and call my sakuragirl... I think she will be angry, but maybe if I take her to see movie she will forgive me. Gambatei!

J-Pop Dawg's J-Pop Life - First Day!

2006-08-14T15:51:00.000+08:00

Hello 2 all my frens & readers!

Since everybody else already got a blog, and they post a lot of nonsense, I decided today that I also can do it! So I am starting now. I am going to tell you all about my J-Pop adventures, my J-Pop girls, and my J-Pop feelings.

This picture is me. Good right? A man wearing a suit come to me in a club and say I am very cool, and can he take my picture and maybe make me a model. I am still waiting, he said he will call me back soon. Maybe you can see me in a magazine soon! =)

Okay, all this writing is quite tiring, not used to it yet. I am going to drink some Martell and relax in the garden with the bonsai plants.